May 21

 Sunday afternoon: 


On Sunday, we returned from our meeting with PF. K answered the door happily, but we asked her to sit down for a serious discussion. When we mentioned that she would not be able to return to school, she hid her head for a long time. AB and LGB sat next to her for several minutes. We asked her what was going on, but she was silent. Usually she would say “I don’t know” but this time she was speechless.


After a while she went to her room and hid under the bed. LGB tried to come up with some ways to get K to open up. LGB drew a “flowchart” for K, starting with an example: “Do you like cats or dogs”? “Do you like meows or purrs”? Do you like soft purrs or loud purrs”? Once K understood the task, LGB presented a second flow chart. “I like school” / “I don’t like school” / “I sometimes like school”. 


K at this point was communicating by writing, not speaking. K wrote, “There was not enoughf options.” LGB asked if K “sometimes liked school” and perhaps she nodded. So LGB wrote “I don’t like school when…” 

  • I have to put my work away

  • When I have to clean up

  • When we do group work, or

  • Not when …?


K responded by writing “Not when people ignore me”.


LGB then presented another set of options; “Not when people ignore me…”

  • …during conversations?

  • …from work?

  • …when I ask them to “do something”

  • …from games.


K chose, “When I ask them to do something.


From there, LGB wrote a sentence, and used the “emotion colour wheel” to get K to complete the sentence.


“When people ignore me when I ask them to do something, I feel”...


K chose: “Hurt”, “Distant”, “Withdrawn”, and “Devastated.”


LGB asked K to say the words, and Kira spoke. She recited the sentence, “When people ignore me when I ask them to do something, I feel hurt, distant, withdrawn, and devastated.”


LGB began to cry, joyous that K had broken her silence and was able to communicate her emotions. Although parents are sometimes asked to “keep it together”, LGB felt that showing a natural emotion would be helpful.

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